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Newsletter Volume 8 - New Year's 2002
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As 2001 draws to a close, I would like to thank all of the Words Can Heal participants for making our inaugural year so successful. We have been inspired by your personal successes which you sent us, and we hope that more of you will submit your stories [story@wordscanheal.org] of how changing your speech changed a relationship, an encounter, or a mood. I also want to thank those of you who have forwarded the newsletter to your contacts and friends. We have signed up thousands of new participants in the last few weeks, thanks largely to your enthusiasm.
The year 2002 is a mirror number. One of the principles of Words Can Heal is that the words we use are mirrored back to us. Critical, negative speech comes back to us as condemning, negative attitudes and atmosphere; positive, kind words come back to us as loving, trusting relationships. For 2002, let’s all resolve to send out into the world only healing speech, and may that positive energy reflect back on you.
Irwin Katsof
Executive Director, Words Can Heal
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Quote of the Week
"A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step - and that includes an inner journey."
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New Year's Resolutions
The beginning of a new year is the perfect time to review our actions and to resolve to do better. Unfortunately, rare is the New Year’s resolution which is remembered, let alone kept, by the end of January.
The Words Can Heal pledge is also a kind of resolution, in which you have resolved to replace words that hurt with words that encourage, engage, and enrich. Whether you took the pledge many weeks ago or today, the following tips will help you turn your pledge into words that heal - all year long.
FOUR SURE WAYS TO FAIL
- Make lots of resolutions. Try to fix everything that is wrong in your life and your behavior.
- Make general, sweeping resolutions, such as: "I will never gossip again," "I will always use encouraging words," "I will never criticize my children."
- Chart your progress. Every time you fail, give yourself a big, black "X".
- If you find yourself slipping, it’s a sign that you simply don’t have what it takes to change in this way.
FOUR SURE WAYS TO SUCCEED
- Make only one resolution this year. The more you focus on one, manageable area, the greater your chance for success. Sure, you have other areas you also need to work on. Save them for 2003, 2004, 2005 . . .
- Resolve to actualize your resolution with small, concrete steps. Let’s say you have resolved, according to the pledge, "to replace words that hurt with words that encourage, engage, and enrich." Now break that general resolution down into small, concrete steps, and for the month of January concentrate only on that first step. For example, your step for January could be to engage in only positive speech during your first coffee break of each day, from 10:00 until 10:15. Or during the first fifteen minutes you’re on the phone after dinner. In February, you could extend that period to thirty minutes daily, adding fifteen minutes each month. By the end of 2002, you will have established a new habit of positive speech. Caution: Do not underestimate the power of guarding your speech for fifteen minutes a day. You will see that it requires a great deal of concentration and self-control. The road to eliminating gossip is strewn with grandiose intentions never fulfilled.
- Chart your accomplishments, so you can see how often you’ve succeeded. Print yourself out a chart with one square for every day of 2002. Post your chart somewhere, such as the door of the refrigerator, where you’ll be sure to see it. Every day that you have succeeded in keeping your resolution, give yourself a check. On days where your resolution was not applicable (you went away for the weekend, you were sick in bed, etc.), put a hyphen. On days that you blew it, leave the box blank. Never give yourself an "X". An "X" is a slap to the soul. Everyone blows it sometimes. Just keep your eye on your checks.
- Give yourself a reward for a job well done, and keep increasing the intervals. For example, after getting ten checks in a row, buy yourself something you’d love, like a new scarf or an expensive tie or a pint of Hagen Daz! For your second reward, you’ll have to get fifteen checks in a row; for your third reward, twenty checks, etc. Don’t dismiss this step as juvenile. It works!
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New Year's Wishes
Everyone at Words Can Heal wishes you a new year in which your aspirations are transformed into concrete change.
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